As part of my new program to become a healthy person (a program whose greatest success so far has been upping my daily water intake to the point of inducing bloating of "Hey, Kool-Aid!"-man-esque proportions), I purchased a set of hand weights during my lunch break the other day. Unfortunately, they are currently residing in my work desk drawer because I soon discovered that they are too freaking heavy to carry for long periods of time. My new goal is to build the strength in my arms up to where I can carry these weights home without dislocating both shoulders. One would be okay.

I'm so motivated by my new health regime that when the snow melts and the sub-zero temperatures subside, I might even take up running. If by running you mean slowly strolling by the lake and stopping for a beer on the way back.